Sometimes
you have to sit in your own truth
I have never
really experienced Spring , as in really
feel the sun on my skin , embrace the smooth breeze that comes with wearing
light clothing, allow myself to feel the love vibe that comes with Spring air and makes you hopeful , sometimes you
have to sit in your own truth , I had a lingering moment with myself when I
experienced an indirect racial comment coming from a spirit that suffers from
self-entitlement yet pretends to love black women . Sometimes you have to sit
in your own truth .
I wish my
mother was still alive so I can overload some of the bullshit I deal with onto
her without being prosecuted for being honest or emotional. Sometimes you have
to sit in your own truth. My thoughts are becoming distasteful like a fat man
judging a skinny woman for not being sexy enough, sometimes you have to sit in
your own truth
My sadness is slowly eating away my passions
and oppressing my mind with hurtful memories that cannot seem to let go of me,
sometimes you have to sit in your own truth . I feel my brother’s touch in my
dreams , I feel his pain as if it were my pain, it’s strange how deep sibling
love flows , sometimes you have to sit in your own truth . I can picture my
mother’s look of disappointment and resentment, it re-bruises my heart daily, sometimes you have to sit in your own truth.
I rebel
against my heart constantly because true happiness frightens me, the thought of
being vulnerable and putting my heart at risk eats away at me when I am alone .
Its difficult to entertain the façade called dreamland , as its too misleading
to the mind , sometimes you have to sit in your own truth , bear the uncomfortable
feelings that come with excepting who you used to be versus who you are now .
There are no
rules in this life , a privileged friend once said to me , without understanding
how difficult it is to heal a broken spirit and shake off life’s hardships ,
sometimes you have to sit in your own truth , let the pain sink in like a drug
, don’t fight the impact it might have on your emotions and body, sometimes you
have to sit in your own truth without judging yourself too much
Most times I
feel more connected to the unknown than the actual people who claim to know me
, sometimes you have to sit in your own truth and trust your heart , take a
leap of faith, take on the impossible , breakdown barriers with a smile and
kill stereotype mentalities , sometimes you have to sit in your own truth and
be your own hero .
Happy
Birthday Ntsitsi!!
Love your
sister.
Phindile.
