Sacrifices
The thing about reading someone else’s life story
is that it gives you a true sense of who they are and a more profound
understanding of where they come from , why they think the way they think or
act the way they do , what they value ,what drives them and more importantly
what’s dearest to them . Winnie Mandela A life, ooh man this book cuts
deep for me & validates the saying “Love is not without sacrifices and
losses” . I am actually annoyed with myself for not reading this book sooner
but then again, as we all know political books can be depressing as fuck .
The thing about sacrifices is that in the moment
one might have good intentions and literally think they are doing good ,not knowing
that one day that sacrifice will be lost in the mist of bad publicity and
unreturned love when its due. I have the utmost respect when it comes to “uMama
Winnie” for the part she played in the struggle, I mean if I was in her shoes I
honest to god don’t think I would have managed . The
heartbreaking thing for me is that the very same man she dedicated three decades
of her life to was more concerned about his own image and political endeavours
instead of working through whatever differences they had when he came out of
prison. What annoys me the most is the lack of full acknowledgment ,appreciation
and respect , granted Mandela was a gugu gaga saint in our eyes , but he was
not the perfect husband nor was uMama Winnie a perfect woman but still she
deserved way more , way more hence this love story cuts like a butchers knife
to the heart for me .
Sacrifices are a bitch sometimes if you ask me,
like I cannot help but be mad for uMama Winnie even though it’s pointless and
not my love story but still, I can imagine her pain , her losses throughout the
decades , her anger at how the apartheid system stole her life in a way , how
the struggle itself robbed her of a normal family and mostly I can imagine her
pain when her divorce was finalized and had to watch an even younger woman from
another country wed Madiba , see that’s another level of pain no one can
anticipate nor prepare for ,this love story just cuts deep for me , politics
aside for a second uMkhulu was a BAN, period!
I once read a line from a book, the comment made
was “Europeans are taught to understand their own history, while Africans read
through history and move on without fully understanding how history has a
direct impact on how things are now in this continent of ours. If I was uMama
Winnie , I would be mad as a mother fucker….period!!, because at the end of the
day ,she was screwed , sacrifices and all , Mandela played her and played her
well . The aftermath of how this love story ends really bothers me because it
validates four things , 1. even the most kind hearted man can be an asshole ,
2. men will love you up until they no longer have any use for you, then simply
replace you when it suits them , 3. Nothing fucks you harder than time ( Game
of Thrones line ) , 4. Marriage is not for everyone .
Mamu Winnie’s love story sucks & hurts all at
once, what I do take away though is that black women are strong and can
withstand anything , even in the most unpleasant circumstances , Mamu Winnie is
my hero period, mistakes & all , at the end of the day no one can re-write
history but one can learn from it .
Jah Bless
Phindile
