Monday 13 August 2012




I have always been  an analytical person by nature but I realised that speaking my truth and not taking shit advice from folks who know nothing about what is in my head works pretty well for me. Love lives in strange places and sometimes it can present itself unexpectedly ,not the way we want it or not even with the person we want, but once it has avail itself you have two options , take everything in stride and embrace it or you can shy away and make up an excuse about how the person is not right for you, because they don’t fit in into the perfect image you have in your head and how the timing is just off for you because your just too occupied with your own plans.

When something feels forced you know it’s not right and when something feels right your heart and mind will gravitate towards it , things become easier , talking and opening up comes natural as nothing is pretence. Doing what feels right for one self is hard and it shouldn’t be but I guess we get caught up in expectations and insecurities that we lose side of what is important in life and somehow rush ourselves into making stupid decisions that we will later regret, for once think about what will happen if you put yourself and needs first, figure out what makes you happy, what do you want out of life , forget about what your friends are doing or how they are living , live your own life , make your own rules then break them again its okay, all will still be well with the world.

Respect for self and sticking to your values will never fail you when it comes to dealing with barriers of any kind, I found myself listening to old school jazzy music that is so comforting to the heart and crying as I miss my loved ones soo much yet at the same time I don’t want to loose myself in grief and in the past , but start a new page on my own with gods guidance and embracing love in all of  my friendships ,learn to be a bit patient with myself but still moving forward. Nothing is never guaranteed and I guess challenges will always be there, thing is though if you are really doing what is best for you everything does really fall into place. God has a weired sense of humour and throughout this past three months  i feel like his been trying to change my mindset and attitude about love , life and self.

My ahah moment , feeling emotionally tiered and finally listening to my body  and just taking a breather , excepting that  I cannot rush my way through healing from my brother’s death, I cannot pace myself with others as I am off a different breed , I cannot rush my way through a relation with any man nor can I make anybody happy until I give all that buddle  of love and joy to myself first , just have a celebration of me while building my relationship with god, as he has led me through this road and he will stick with me till the end of it, all I have to do is to be open to changing and learning more about myself and those who i find interesting .

They say love is a choice , followed by a feeling you choose to have for a specific person because of the characters you see and like in them, I say love to love , go after what you think is ment for you even if you don’t feel good enough , make others laugh as that’s healing  ,maintain a balance between  work and a personal life and just be present  as only time will tell, lastly remember that love never goes out of style.

love

BrendaJ….

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